Degrees and Certifications:
I teach Band... in the band room...
Biography: I was born a genius. I did not become a super genius until the age of 4. At the age of 7, I became the world's 3rd richest individual through various benefactors and one exceptionally wealthy uncle. I became poor and destitute during the 'Great Depression' when the bottom fell out of the racing snail market and all of my money withered away.
I don't enjoy the taste of brussel sprouts. Or Asparagus. Could do without eating liver for the rest of my life as well - since we're on the subject.
I've watched every episode of M*A*S*H. Oh! I have also never seen a real live unicorn. (I thought I had once, but it turned out to be a honey badger eating an ice cream cone.)